And He said unto me, "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."
2 Corinthians 12:9

Friday, June 1, 2012

God is Good...


All the time...GOD IS GOOD!!

We haven't heard back from the Mayo Clinic yet.  However, I signed in to my patient account this morning to find a dictation from yesterday's meeting.  The gist of it all is that even though they have new technology that didn't exist during the first brain surgery, they still feel as if there is too much proof that my seizures are bilateral (originating on both sides of my brain).  They said this keeps me from being a surgical candidate.

Their recommendation was immunotherapy and to speak with my immunologist.  However, while at Mayo in February my immunologist placed me on what he referred to as the "nuclear bomb" of immunotherapy.  If it worked, it told them that something would work and they would find the correct type of treatment.  If it didn't wipe it all out, nothing else would...A few days after we returned I had so many seizures and what appeared to be an allergic reaction (that we now think is a new type of seizure that I'm having).  Thus, my immunologist said surgery was my only option.  This is why it was sent to surgical conference. So, there must have been a bit of a lack of communication somewhere. 

This leaves us feeling like our hands are truly tied, though.  What do we do if both docs say there is not an option?  In the last week, I've already had 37 seizures.  This is a huge increase.  It's as if the seizures are becoming more frequent and more intense.  B and I discussed a million different options today.  We just don't understand.  What do we do?  Do we trust that the Lord has a plan in this that we just can't see and how do we live that out on a daily basis?  Are we still supposed to try new treatments?  Do we stop searching and just go back to the lowest dose of meds (that gave me the same control that I have now on a super high dose of meds) and try to learn how to live life with seizures?  Do we go down some other crazy path for a treatment? 

Then, I looked at my cell phone a few minutes ago.  I get a message each day with a Bible Verse for the Day.  When I opened it, my jaw dropped.  This is B's grandparent's verse, B's parents' verse, and they had it framed for us for our wedding and it hangs above our mantle for every person to see that walks in our door:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6

So, we trust in HIM. 
Even though we don't understand.
We give HIM glory because HE is the only true God and the only true Healer!
We are reaching out to hold HIS hand and follow HIS path for my health and healing!

Thank you all for praying!

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