FW: Joy's Journal

Joy's Journal Friday, September 30, 2011   For my journal entry this time, I wanted to write a letter to Connor to commemorate his 11th birthday. I wanted to share this letter with MacKenzie, Carson and Mason to help remember Connor on his special day.   Dear Connor,   It's your birthday this Sunday and your third birthday in heaven. Happy 11th birthday!  I can't imagine how fantastic your birthday celebration is in heaven, or maybe everyday is like a celebration there. We will be thinking of you and missing you on your special day.   We can't even imagine what your days are like in heaven. We continue to keep up the good fight down here. Mackenzie is growing up into a beautiful, mature, independent young lady. I remember the days when she used to dress you in her princess costumes. Mason remembers you often.  He says  "I miss Connor. He was such a good brother. He loved me". What a blessing from God that he still remembers you, especially since he was only three when you went to heaven.  Carson really had the hardest time dealing with your absence, but I know that God is slowly moving him through his grief.   God is also carrying your dad and me. I can't imagine getting through one day of this without Him.   We are trying to make the best of the situation - believing the promise "all things work together for good to those who love Him and are called according to his purpose". Romans 8:28. We are growing TeamConnor to continue your legacy and try to make your wish come true - that know other child would have to go through what you did. We introduced Connor the caterpillar to hopefully someday be the national icon for childhood cancer to raise awareness. We will be releasing our devotional book and Your Childrens book next year. We want to spread God's message of hope to so many. We pray that God would bless all of these endeavors.   The other day, I was listening to the song "The Words I Would Say" by Sidewalk Prophets. The words echoed what my heart wanted to say to you. If I could go back in time and I had you again for a moment on May 15, 2005 (diagnosis day), these are the words I would say.   Be strong in the Lord And never give up hope You're gonna do great things I already know God's got His hands on you So don't live life in fear Forgive and forget But don't forget why you're here Take your time and pray And thank God for each day His love will find a way These are the words I would say   The funny thing is - I think you already knew all this. The way you lived your life exemplified this. I'm still in awe at how you journeyed so well, son. We live each day trying to honor your memory as we keep walking with God and sharing your story of hope with others.  Hope you're proud of us.   Always believing,   Mom