What We Already Knew

He is GOD! Wow! Have we ever learned that...something we already knew.

You know that songs always get me/inspire me:

This morning, we heard Hillsong's, Mighty to Save:

Savior, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever, Author of Salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave

So take me as You find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in
Now I surrender

Shine your light
And let the whole world see
We're singing
For the glory of the risen King, Jesus

I surrender, Lord...that's what finally happened yesterday.

Have you ever read, "Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire," by Jim Cymbala? I have been reading it a little bit, here and there. I brought it with me to the hospital last week and didn't pick it up until yesterday...God's timing!! I was so frustrated, scared, and felt awful.

Just so you know, I have kept a very strict journal over the last two years of exactly how many "episodes" I have had, what I was doing, what meds I was taking, etc. So, every time the doctors wanted to change my meds, say we needed to do a different test, or whatever, I could pull out my spreadsheet and say, "no, we've done this or that and it only made it worse or this is the only time it has been better." It was allowing me to be in control. Then, I read this yesterday in Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire,

"God is not aloof.
He says continually through the centuries,
'I'll help you, I really will.
When you're ready to throw up your hands-throw them up to me'."

Wow, I've been trying to control this rather than let Him work. So, Ben and I discussed it and decided that I will no longer keep this log and just trust HIM!! I haven't had a seizure since 1p yesterday.

The next chapter that I read discussed how he knows the # of hairs on our head (that's tough to keep up with since I've lost so much since this started).
"And the very hairs on your head are all numbered." Matthew 10:30 (NLT)

So, my God, who can move mountains, can do this. I just need to let Him. I've always known HE could do it. I just never let Him. This doesn't mean I will never have another seizure, but it does mean, He is God and I am not.