Anniversary Celebration

We got to celebrate our 12th Wedding anniversary a few weeks ago!!!  Ben wore the shirt that he was wearing when I first saw him and went, "when did he get so cute?"  I wore the shirt that I apparently wore to all of our Sunday date dinners through college!  The good thing is that we can still wear them, the bad thing is that we still have them 14+ years later!!!

We went to our favorite spot for dinner and learning that it was our anniversary, you can see above the gift they gave to us!!  It was so sweet!!!

I'm so blessed to be married to this man!!!

I praise the Lord for my Ephesians 5:22-33 Man:

Marriage Like Christ and the Church

Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.  But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.

 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.  So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;  for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church,  because we are members of His body.  For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.  This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.  Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.

Update, Tension

Thank you for all of YOU....our precious friends and Prayer Warriors.  Princess posted last that things were starting out rough for the month of September.  Unfortunately, the trend is continuing and we are reminded that throughout our recent favorable results and even coming off of a good month in August, Princess' journey to full recovery is going to be long.  Each day has its challenges and we have to be mindful to not let is distract and take away from the good that God is doing!  So, please continue to be in prayer for Princess.

The other night was a harsh reminder of the challenges that have faced us in these last nine years.  While making it through Monday with no seizures, Tuesday was in fact different and we ended the day with a seizure that lasted well over an hour and even meant we would have to administer a rescue med to try to break the cycle.  While the med worked in about a hour's time, it was a frustrating and discouraging moment when things seemed to be going well.

While we don't know what to attribute the recent uptick to, we have to continue to keep our focus on Christ and His work in Princess' life.  We have to remind ourselves of the good that He has done and where we came from.  Recently, Princess acquired an infection that we had to treat with antibiotics, then we actually reduced her pharmaceuticals.  Both of these could very well be factors leading to the increase, but nearly a week later, it is exhausting and bewildering.  Additionally, we recently got lab results back that indicate the concentration of her pharmaceuticals in her blood is actually greater (despite the decrease/taper) which means she is "toxic" or over medicated; therefore, possibly creating another link to the increase in seizures....Oh, what a balance.

Please pray for the direction, and the understanding to see what is going on.  Later this morning we are jumping on a phone conference with one of our doctors to consult all these variables and seek what direction to take.

Regarding tension....Sunday at church was an incredible time of worship.  During worship, our worship leader gave us a great reminder of how God can actually use our situation and compliment our situation despite the chaos or tension that is sometimes present.  Very often we think that when bad happens that it must be the work of Satan himself, surely not our Almighty and Loving God.  But is this really true?  No!  God does allow things to be a part of our life that may not seem pleasant or good.  We  have certainly seen this first hand.  So this past Sunday, our Worship Leader reminded us of a term called dissonance.

What was illustrated and played out for us was the reality of a harsh and disagreeable combination of just two notes on the piano.  The the painful combination played out, lingered, and created tension in our ears and mind, the leader reminded us that sometimes that tension is created and persists, but that it takes just a few more additional musical notes to accompany the then created tension to create great harmony and comfort.  Wow!  What a great illustration!  So while we feel tension....while we see the chaos that is all around us, we seek God to compliment the tension and to make beautiful music of our lives to bring glory to Him and to  Him alone.

So, thank you for your prayers for Princess.  Thanks for being part of our journey!  We look forward to sharing more in the coming days!

Rough Day/Week

I must start by saying that we have had some great weeks!!  Praise the Lord!!!

My seizures went from 22/wk at the end of July, to 9/wk, to 0/ wk, to 1/wk.  I actually went 16 days without a seizure!!!  All Praise to the only ONE that can heal me, Jesus!!  Last week, I had three Auras, still a huge improvement over where we were.  After that, I still went three days without a seizure.

However, now we are already at 7 for this week, that's just in the last 3 days.  I know it's part of getting off of the medicine, yet it's not fun!!  These are probably what's referred to as withdraw seizures.  Thus, my body is so used to this medicine (that we've learned is harder to get off of than meth, yet the FDA approves it) that it doesn't know how to function without it.  It is one of the strongest meds out there, yet it wasn't doing the trick.  However, Charlotte's has brought so much healing!!!  It's been incredible to have the longest days ever without seizures!!!

The kicker to having days without seizures (though I'll take as many as I can get) is that when I have one, it's as if my endurance level has to start all over.  When I start to have 5/day, I get used to that.  However, when I have 1/day and then have 5 one day.  That day with five is exhausting.  Thus, the pure exhaustion.  To go 16 days without seizures and then to have one, wore me out.  Much less to have as few as I had in the last 25+ days and then all of a sudden, have a bunch each day and two within three hours of waking this morning.

They say it should take about two years for me to get off of this yucky med and then another year to get off of the other med (and there might be an alternation of which one we drop).  So, there is no quick fix and these meds are so addictive vs. Charlotte's.  Thus, I have three years ahead of me (unless the Lord chooses to speed it up for some reason) before I am completely off of pharmaceutical meds, which are causing so many negative side effects!!

So, will you pray?  Pray that these seizures stop and that I am able to get off of these pharmaceuticals with wisdom.  Please pray that I am able to spend good, quality time with Miss P.  This morning, she wanted to play with Mommy so badly before breakfast and I had a seizure with her sitting right here and had no energy to follow.  It's so hard!!

Romans 5:3-5New International Version

³ Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴ perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵ And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

2 Corinthians 12:7-10 NIV

⁷ So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. ⁸ Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. ⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. ¹⁰ For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.